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Been thinking.... - Random babblings of a fiber-obsessed nutcase

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Previous Entry Been thinking.... Jun. 19th, 2012 @ 01:43 pm Next Entry
Anna's posted some thought-provoking blogs lately. 1 rang a bell.....talking about current trends in books.

I LOVE to read. I'll read just about anything that isn't nailed down - I LOVE the written word. Granted, some books are better than others, but fluff has it's place, just like Great Books do. I don't look down on people for their reading choices - heck, I've been buying comic books lately, trying to get Himself back into reading! - but I do think we need to consider WHAT we are reading.

This weekend, I got on a Jane Austen fan-fic binge. (What? I LOVE her books, but she didn't write enough, and she didn't "finish the story". Some fan-fics are not that bad, actually, and make for a nice closure.) I have most of Sharon Latham's "Pemberly Chronicles" (I think I have them all, but since I don't buy new, I can't say that for sure.) - she starts with Elizabeth and Darcy's wedding day, and goes from there. She's a little more....graphic than Ms. Austen ever *thought* of being, but they are pretty well-written, and have the same "flavor" as Pride and Prejudice. Anyway.

I found myself getting irritated with my lovely husband, because he wasn't as romantic/manly/whatever as Ms. Latham's version of Darcy....and I realized that books can be very dangerous to healthy relationships. (So, I'm slow - I've NEVER been affected by a *book* like this before!)(And this wasn't my first time thru these books - I've read all of them at least once before, and it didn't affect me then.)

Of COURSE he isn't perfect - he's HUMAN (Anna, I'm using the "normal" use of perfect here. :lol:). He has faults - but he's a fine example of husband-hood, and father-hood, and man-hood! He is as God made him - and I have NO BUSINESS comparing him to a fictional character! But then I started wondering.....

How many women do this? How many get pissed at their spouse/boyfriend because he ISN'T as "good" as a fictional character - and how many do it subconsciously? How many relationships have been ruined because the Adversary used a book (or many books) to subvert a woman's mind? (Or a man's mind- I'm sure "boy books" have the same effect.) I mean, we all know about how super-models affect a girl's self-esteem - but what about fictional characters?

I'm NOT saying you shouldn't read fluffy bodice-rippers - they're sometimes just what I need to fill my time with. But.....we should be aware of what the books are doing to us....because it kinda scared me. (And again - I've NEVER noticed being affected by a book before now, and I read a LOT. 2 - 3 books per week, usually.....mostly fiction. Mostly "fluff" fiction, or Historical Romance.....and NEVER have I compared anyone in real life to a character in the book. NEVER.)(You know what I mean - anyone important to me. Like a husband vs. Hero of a book. Of COURSE I've "seen" familiar people in fictional characters - that's what makes a good book; you can put yourself and your "people" in the story.)

I know movies/TV shows have been conditioning people to accept stuff for *years* - who's to say books haven't been doing the same? I've noticed an uptick in dystopian literature lately (Hunger Games, et al)....and movies/TV shows seem to be getting darker. (And more...lewd. We watch Big Bang Theory.....and while it's funny, I wouldn't let younger kids watch - Himself might be right at the limit; he's mature for his age, and I don't censor language....but some of the jokes are, well - raunchy. He's not THAT mature, so most of them go over his head, but still...this is a PRIME TIME show!) We're rapidly descending into Sodom-territory....and we seem to be speeding up. (Even without the supernatural-type books hitting the shelves lately......stuff that wouldn't have been allowed any where NEAR Prime-Time 10 years ago is now mild. It's......ugh.)

I don't know where I'm going with this.....but I needed to get it out there. It's been bugging me since Saturday morning, when I realized what I was doing. Fortunately, I didn't snap at my husband - I realized what was happening before that - but still. The simple fact that I was comparing him - and he wasn't coming out on top! - to a fictional character....that was sobering. And made me start thinking.

This entry was originally posted at http://fiberaddict.dreamwidth.org/696311.html. Please comment there using OpenID.
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From:(Anonymous)
Date:June 20th, 2012 01:59 pm (UTC)

aNNa says:

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My ex-BFF (who ditched me twice, because her hub says I'm 'dangerous') had the same mindset about romance. She said romances were evil because they made women have impractical expectations about spouses. I returned with 'that's why we're supposed to keep fiction and reality separate'. If you can't separate fiction from reality, by all means, find a padded cell somewhere. ((Or a husband who will pad it for you.)) But sheesh, this argument pisses me off. For that matter, TV shows do the same thing. So do songs. Oops, there goes your television, along with your books, and music! - false expectations of love in lyrics, it's gotta go! Poetry... out. Art! Get rid of it... it might cause someone to think about relationships unhealthily. Remember that photo of the sailor kissing the girl on the docks? How many hundreds of girls were disillusioned with their first mates when THEY didn't kiss THEM like that?!

Do you see what I mean?
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From:fiberaddict
Date:June 20th, 2012 02:19 pm (UTC)

Re: aNNa says:

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Yes - and I'm NOT saying ditch the books! Just - be aware of what they can do to you.

And I've had the headache from Hell ever since I "shook" off the book.....could have been an attempt to derail me somehow. I've NEVER been affected like this before.
(spin a yarn)
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